Last night, we went to hang out with our friends Chris and Tesa. They were having a hot dog roast and a camp-out in their yard for the kids. As we headed back to Chillicothe, it was just Jen and I. The car was quiet. We have made this drive thousands of times. As we approached Hoffman Lane, my thoughts went to my Grandma Pettit. She lived on Hoffman Lane my entire life. So many times we had turned on to Hoffman Lane to go visit my grandparents. I spent so much of my childhood at the end of that Lane. I had played many pickup football games, caught many lightening bugs, learned to drive a car, and ate some of the best food in my life at the end of that Lane. At that moment, the realization that I would never have a reason to drive down that lane ever again. It hit me pretty hard. Last July, my Grandma passed away.
As all of these memories filled my mind, I told Jen, "I don't have a reason to ever drive down the lane again." She replied, "I know." I had the responsibility of delivering my Grandmothers eulogy. I started replaying her service in my mind. Did I say the right things? Did I portray her life in a way that she deserved? Would she have been pleased with service? Did I do her life justice with those short 15 minutes? I was starting to get emotional. I began to have a rush of anxiety that I just did not do enough! It was way to quiet in the car! I grabbed the volume on the radio and broke the silence... As the radio over took the silence, I realized it was the song. I sang a song for my Grandmother at the service. I will lift my eyes by Bebo Norman. I looked at Jen with sort of an astonished look..."what are the chances that song would be playing?" There she was. My Grandma. Re-affirming that it was all good.
A year has passed. I miss her.
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2 comments:
It is hard to believe that a whole year has passed since then.
I will also re-affirm that you have no reason to be anxious. You did an amazing job.
Love you bro,
-E
It is so nice to get that reassurance that everything is alright isn't it?
As I sit around taking care of Paul I miss my mom so much. I'm sure she could have given me such insight during these times : /
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